On the surface, this may seem like an odd question. The reality however is that anything that touches your life, ultimately affects your wellness as an employee. In this post, we will explore why loving relationships matter, how that affects your wellness as an employee and how to cultivate them. There are three reasons loving relationships matter.
Loving relationships help us heal from childhood trauma
Childhood trauma is real for a lot of people. Sexual, physical and mental abuse are common themes for a lot of children all over the world. The effects of these events last a lifetime if no treatment or counseling is sought. This can lead to adults who are so affected by the past trauma that they cannot function in society. As an employee, this could manifest itself as a lack of focus at work, an intense fear of forming friendships at work or a deep mistrust for your boss (a representation of authority). All of these can affect your work adversely. Apart from seeking the help of a licensed mental health professional, loving relationships help to heal those past wounds.
Loving relationships make life transitions easier.
Change is inevitable. Perhaps your company was recently acquired and there have been changes in management. Or, you may have been given a new role that is currently causing you stress. All of these work-related changes and associated stress is understandable. If there is a loving relationship however, the blow of these types of transitions becomes lighter.
A loving relationship influences life choices
A loving relationship can influence a change your diet and help you choose the right exercise regimen. The birth of a new child for instance, may cause you to rethink your health choices since you would like to be around longer to enjoy time with them. Making healthier choices means there will be fewer sick days and increases the likelihood of your productivity at work. Ultimately, your productivity benefits you, your family and your employer.
As you can see, loving relationships do have an effect on your health and wellness as an employee. So how do you develop them?
Five keys to cultivating a loving relationship
As with any life endeavor, cultivating a healthy and loving relationship is not a walk in the park. There is work involved.
Spend quality time together
This sounds cliché but it’s not. It is easy to allow relationships to go months without any quality time together. It doesn’t matter who you are or what kind of relationship it is, if you don’t spend quality time enjoying each other, the relationship will break down. The good news is that quality time does not have to be an elaborate and expensive show. A walk in the park together to get ice cream on a warm summer evening works just as well.
One of the top causes for divorce is a lack of communication. That’s right. Lack of communication follows infidelity and money problems as the number 3 reason for divorce. Every relationship has problems. The key to solving those problems is open communication. It is never okay to sweep problems under the rug. They will only fester and become a bigger problem down the line.
Take time to find yourself as a person
We just talked about spending quality time together as a key to developing a loving relationship. However, it is equally important that you take the time to find out who you are as a person. What do you like? What do you dislike? Would you rather stay at home and watch a movie or are you an outgoing person? What hobbies do you enjoy or would you like to pursue? Finding out who you are as a person brings out the best in you and will allow you to give your best to the relationship and to your work.
We all have different personality types and usually we think everyone else needs to be like us. The Myers-Briggs test exists for a reason! Because we are so different, we all have different natural tendencies and needs. In a loving relationship, it is good to be considerate of the other person’s needs.
Treat them the way they want to be treated
This point ties in to the point above. It is important to really know what the other person interprets as love. A box of chocolates may seem romantic to one person while changing the oil their car may be another person’s cup of tea. Taking the time to find out how a person wants to be treated is key to a loving relationship.
Your overall wellness as an employee depends heavily on having loving relationships in your life. For employers, this is a good reason to incorporate events like Family Day, Bring Your Kid to Work Day and programs along these lines into your company employee wellness program. It certainly takes work to take care of this section of our human lives; but it is worth it.
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